My husband and I are sometimes guilty of playing some pride games. These games are almost always linked to wanting to be right, or wanting something that we’re not getting (time, affection, affirmation, etc.) – that we think we are entitled to.  Our pride games have included: ignoring each other, holding grudges, bringing up past faults, score keeping, refusing to apologize first, and blaming. 

 In April of 1989 President Ezra Taft Benson gave an amazing talk on pride.  He said, “Pride is a sin that can readily be seen in others but is rarely admitted in ourselves. Pride [in our marriages]  is manifest in so many ways, such as faultfinding, gossiping, backbiting, murmuring, living beyond our means, envying, coveting, withholding gratitude and praise that might lift another, and being unforgiving and jealous."

"Selfishness is one of the more common faces of pride. 'How everything affects me' is the center of all that matters—self-conceit, self-pity, self-fulfillment, self-gratification, and self-seeking. Another face of pride is contention. Arguments, fights, unrighteous dominion, divorces, spouse abuse, and disturbances all fall into this category of pride."

"Contention in our families drives the Spirit of the Lord away. It also drives many of our family members away. The scriptures tell us that “only by pride cometh contention.” (Prov. 13:10)  The antidote for pride is humility—meekness, submissiveness. It is the broken heart and contrite spirit.”  (Benson. 1989)

We need to choose to be humble, just like Pres. Kimball said.  We can choose to be humble by esteeming others as ourselves, receiving counsel and chastisement, forgiving others, giving selfless service, and loving God and putting Him first in our lives.

When Michael and I allow pride into our marriage it is always effected negatively.  The price we pay for our pride is a lack of peace and love in our home.  Even our children are affected negatively when we are arguing and being prideful.  The outcomes of these pride games are: a bad example set for our kids, lack of peace, defensive feeling, lack of the Holy Spirit in our home, impatience, and bad moods.

The natural man or woman in all of us is a selfish and prideful being.  It is our challenge to overcome those natural tendencies.  Our marriages and our lives will benefit greatly if we do.